Truth Without Rhyme but with a Modicum of Reason

Find me on the godhead for that's where I've been residing since I've met you

I am looking at the starry night and count six shooting stars my own

I've beamed my prayer into the sky knowing that there is no guessing left to ponder

All the words I could possibly point in your direction have been declared and are affixed

To a firmament twinkling with a multi splendor past 

I have wished to say so many things in this past 24 hour period but I have mostly remained Silent out of fear

Ah, how silence can both be blissful and baleful 

I would have said so many things to you but I feared that they would dislodge all manners of unease

That these confessions would make you run for the hills and take unequivocal flight

I was afraid, yes, I was afraid, but then, what is fear but false emotion appearing real

But the mind killer that is the little death that brings total annihilation

What good does it serve me? What good? Fuck the fear that holds it all in

Fuck the fear that I have that your feelings, your assertions, and affections, and attentions

Will but disintegrate and disappear into the ether, as if they had never existed

You are not a figment of my imagination, you are not a diaphanous spirit

You are real and firm to the touch, and I can't get enough of your energy and essence and effervescence

Linear time is of no consequence, there is no measure to this feeling that continually ascends 

That rises on your watch and leaves me yearning for more of you, of all that you represent

Don't be reluctant to share all of you, the ugliest of truth is better than an omission

It's when we are left to assume that all turns to shit, wouldn't you agree?

this is the third time that I compose words in your name so late at night

I wanted to scream when all that wanted to come out, all that I had held in because of mental trepidation

fell away into the digital backbone, suddenly irretrievable, forever gone

I wanted to scream at the potential omen, at the seemingly heavy portent but then

What matters in life carries weight and it requires effort and some amount of dedication

So, I am not deterred by having lost words; they are out there floating in a void of love and fullness

And these words carry your imprint

It's been written, we are inscribed, my love, we are, in your words, marionettes of the Orisha

And the imagery couldn't ring more true - there is Olokun holding the treasure

Awaiting to be tapped and taken, hidden in the deep, there are blue immaculate Yemaya and deep purple Babalu Aye

Chrysocolla weaving magic with cowry shells - I feel your verdant eyes lingering on mine

We are no accident, no inconsequential dyad soon to vanish into remnant dust

We are blazing potential of the creative force of this cosmos, of the shiny tapestry of this universe

We are meant to burn and to burn in all our madness and all our wildness and our entire 

duality and bi-polarity - there is nothing that need be left untouched

Don't hide yourself from me, my Love, - that is the only thing I ask and humbly beg of you

I am here to take you in, entirely, to accept you entirely, to be the forge and the torch, to toast to

Life, love, virility, intoxication, color, wind, sails a-blazing. senses forever firing - embers but an after image 

You are lion and lyre, rebirth in all its fascinating facets

I am making myself entirely available, entirely yours - if I have to lyrically announce it - so I must

If I have to scream it to be heard - I will stand on the sidelines no longer

There are tangos to be danced, cords to be learned, strokes to be explored

There is inertia and there is whirlwind, there is you and there is us

The book of secrets is the budding butterfly ready for pleasure tantrums and reckless frivolity

If the depths is what we've both been seeking, what we wish to go for

Then there simply cannot be any other way but in - in, in, in, goddamnit all in

I can't deny that your disappearance has been weighing down my mood

I can't deny that it has offered me two sleepless nights, but with it an avalanche of 

words that have been wishing to come out and shooting stars to seal my love

I can't deny that I want to know what's been going through your mind

I admit I am scared that I may have said something in my eagerness to share

That could have left you with a sense of retreat and regret

How I wish I could erase some of those words I ushered in without proper vetting

I sometimes let fear based expression rule a conversation and what it leaves me with

Is having to sort through what had no business coming out

If I ruled the world, then you wouldn't know of those thoughts that don't serve

But alas, I am but human and error prone at that

I do love you, don't doubt it one bit !

I also cherish and adore and care for you - but could these words be too worn out to truly

Reflect the immense well of goodwill I have unearthed since meeting you?

How I wish I had a symphony up my sleeve or a lion's portrait itching at my finger tips

All creative endeavor would find expression in a suite of renditions that 

revere and honor you and maybe tell you how time is but love stacked vertically

I already knew I loved you because you are right, Lovely You, we've searched for eons

And now the time is ripe and it is there for the taking, if we will it and accept it

I do very much miss your warmth, your arms, your energy, your breath, your roar, your moan, your voice, your lips - oh, those lips

I miss the effusions and the affections, the assertions and the flurry of attraction

I will not let fear rule the day - I will not, I shall not, this cannot - no, it cannot

I looked at the stars tonight and they whispered to me to make a repeated wish

Your number is 6 and this is the number that tumbled from the velvet night sky

I love you - how else can I put it 

I wish to be all for you and to you and I wish the same be true for you

We are not incidental, we are not made for a singular plane of existence

We are water made air whipped up and made vast

Come with me, allow me to be yours, let me see you

It is late and yet you have my every thought -

it's our choice

I say fuck fear, fuck inertia, fuck depression, fuck the darkness

We are fucking light - you and me - we are light, baby

Let us make unbridled, fiery, fierce and fiendish art

 

I dare us