Proofs of Love

When you say you love someone

What does it really mean?

Do you love him

Because he sees beautiful things in you

And you see beautiful things in him?

Do you love him

Because you have fun with him and 

As such often laugh out loud?

Do you love him

Because the sex is incredible?

Do you love him

Because he makes you look good

In front of others?

Do you love him

Because he stimulates your mind?

Do you love him because

He cooks up a storm

And prepares all your favorite dishes?

Do you love him

Because he loves pets?

Do you love him

Because he manages money well?

Do you love him

Because you two share the same tastes and interests?

Do you love him

Because you can rely on him during tough times?

Do you love him

Because he is a good nurse when you're sick?

Do you love him

Because you can picture him to be

The father of your children?



There are so many reasons

For why we fall 'in love'

For why we decide to leave

The dating game behind

And instead focus our time

On just a single one

Because we are flawed beings

We probably choose our current mate

Based on criteria that include

Both genuine interest in

And professed admiration for our partner

While admitting to self interest based on

What is making us feel better


In the Western World

Or let's just say the United States

"Enlightened" relationships

Appear to be rare

Many times we wish for our Other

To positively reflect on us

Or we want a partner

Who has our challenge-ridden back

When things in life go wrong


Alas more often than not

And rather sooner than later

Things fall to the teetering wayside


A purely selfless love

One that puts forth no conditions

A love that asks nothing in return

Is something we mostly read about

It's not something most any of us

Goes out to practice out and about

It's an idealistic projection for the most part

Because when the ego operates

And operates at its best

We surely and for safety reason want something 

In return for the love we wish and plan to extend

And expectations often speak as such:

"Will you be there for me

When I need you,

When I am sick

When I am lying in the hospital

At my deathbed?"


Assurances almost always

Are being made

To satisfy the common needs and wants

Because doesn't love mean

You would at least consider to lie down your life

For your beloved other

If life demanded

It be so?


Can someone therefore declare his love

For another person

Only to add an explicit caveat

That when things become complicated

When fun runs out of steam

And unexpected health related risks arise

This changed scenario is not something

He wants to involve himself in?

Does the argument stick

That it's but romantic humbug

To proclaim that you'd be willing

To risk your health and your life

For your love?

How far should or does one go

For the person they deem the one

Or should there even be a measuring stick?


Let's set the premise and say that

You love someone

Setting all the relative and individual aside

Doesn't love suggest

Using a most universal tone

That there is a force in you

That has awakened

By means of said person?

Isn't this force informed by feelings

Of extending and offering emotions

That wish to mingle with

The one you say you love?

Aren't you willing to go on a limb

For the one to whom you have declared your heart?

Wouldn't you do things

That you normally wouldn't do

Things that you would probably

Think three times over

If it meant putting yourself in harm's way

For someone whom you consider 'not that close'?

Isn't love in other words

Characterized by a certain diminished importance

Placed on what you call self interest?

Aren't you becoming more concerned

About not hurting the other

Although ironically enough

We often do end up hurting

The ones we say we love the most

But leaving this egoic perversity aside

Isn't love in its most basic function

Its bottom line definition

An emotion that allows you

To tap your altruistic vein

Or differently stated

To be more aligned with your intrinsic nature

One that places

The very real manifestations

Of love and compassion

Above mere survival of self?


It seems that saying

'I love you


No, I won't be with you

If you contract a contagious disease'

Are two statements that appear incompatible

Of course, everyone loves in their own way

And everyone's definition of love

Is slightly different from the person

They are standing next to

So what if he says

That being willing to be intimate with someone

Who has, let's say, an STD

Is some stupid notion of trying to make a point

That you are in love

Or at least

That is what is being received and understood so far

Would it then mean that anything

Contracted by accident

And which could pose a health risk

To the lover

Would then imply or explicitly mean

Having to disband

Because how selfish can you be

To expect your loved one

To incur the slightest possibility

Of discomfort and pain?

Love shouldn't ask such a thing

And yes, on an evolved level

It would appear that love should be

Or is simply given

Without any need to have the ego stroked

Without the two way street

That we've been taught to expect

And have witnessed in print, on screen, out here

It's a give and take

We are mostly told

But don't the marriage vows

Go: In health as well as in sickness

And for better or forever worse?


But now we are talking religious dogma and institutions

And the mighty Church likes to keep everything in line

For society to survive and thrive

So it really comes down once again

To personal preference

And the arguments and attitudes

That you are o.k. with in life

If you are not bothered by

The currently stated fact

Of the person

You've loved in the past

And maybe could love again

Who tells you that if you had a debilitating condition or illness

Let alone an STD, however contracted,

He most surely wouldn't come near you physically

Then there is nothing further

To talk about


If, however, you stir uneasily

At the possible implications of this statement

And you further know yourself to be

Someone other than Buddha, who famously

And calmly sat in an accepting pose

On a commonly imagined mountain top

Then it may be time

To figure out how far you want things to go

And whether your definition of love

Can include and more so embrace

The idea that being left alone

Could quite possibly become a reality

Sometime down the line

Because life can get messy quite easily

And you know you still have your ways to go

Until consciousness catches up

And until that time

You may want to ask yourself:

In my definition

Would I want this kind of love?